Life is Not a Straight Line

When you start school everything is mapped out for you and progress happens in a linear fashion. You know, for example, that at 15, you will do GCSE’s. At 18, you will go on to take A Levels. At university, after 3 years (or however long your course is) you will get a degree. At each step you collect your symbol of achievement (your grades etc) and automatically progress to a higher level. The education system is a great security blanket which provides a very clear path and sense of direction.

Then you graduate and you enter the real world. You look around and see that the real world is not remotely linear. The real world goes against pretty much everything that you’re taught in education. You may realize that it’s not necessarily the brainiest or most educated people who get to the top; that a great education does not guarantee immediate riches; and that there is no straight forward path for success. There are no tests to take which will guarantee your entry to the next level of life. This reality can be very frightening, particularly because most twentysomethings are unprepared for it.

But life itself does not happen in a straight line, nor is it mapped out for you. There are ups and downs, highs and lows, twists and turns. It’s up to each and everyone of us to clear our own path through the forest and make our way through. It requires us to take responsibility for ourselves in every way, something that we have not necessarilly been taught how to do and something that we often resist doing because it makes us truly accountable for how our lives turn out.

The fact that life isn’t a straight line is also hugely exciting. It means that you can make it go in whichever direction you choose. It also means accepting that your destiny lies in your hands and you are shaping it each and every day. Rather than being subject to someone else’s terms and conditions, you can create your own. It is, in fact, the ultimate freedom; one to be embraced with both hands.

In school, we are taught that there is a right way and a wrong way to do things. Many of us are afraid of making mistakes, of not getting it ‘right’. This paralyses us and we become afraid of moving forward in any direction. But that is an illusion. Everything we do that helps us to learn and grow is what’s right for us. Those things are what will take us to the next level and ensure our success as people. It will take us in a zig-zag, round about manner, but that’s ok because that’s life. And life is not a straight line!

Poking Fun at Success, South Park Style

Following on from the last post, check out this brilliant animation made by Trey Parker and Matt Stone (creators of South Park)… In their own funny way, they poke fun at the traditional notions of success that we are often taught through education and by our society.http://www.neticons.net/music_life/

What’s Your Definition of Success?

In our hyper-consumerist society, success is usually defined by what you have or what you do. From a young age we are taught that success in life is based on which grades you get, which school and university you attend, which company you end up working in and how much you earn. I’m not saying that these things are unimportant, but it can be rather depressing when you have got your straight A’s, your degree from a red-brick university, your £30K a year starting salary and a job at one of the country’s top firms only to find that you don’t feel like much of a success at all.

Very subtly, our education and work system teaches that we must impress and gain approval from our parents, our teachers, our professors, and even our peers, if we are to get on in life… But rarely are we encouraged to consider look inside ourselves and ask how we feel about the things we do.

The concept of inner success is one that is totally missing from our society, yet external achievements are irrelevant if not matched by an internal feeling of accomplishment, a sense of contentment and generally feeling good about oneself and one’s achievements. I’m sure we can all cite at least one case of someone who seemingly has it all yet is still unhappy and I’m sure there are people reading this who are extremely successful from an outsider’s perspective but are still searching for more because they don’t feel satisfied.

I’ve come to realise that success is not only ’out there’. Success is who you are and how you feel. Success is not just in the destination or in the final result but in the process of getting there. Success is in the learning, in the overcoming of obstacles, in your growth and development as a person. Success is about knowing who you are and feeling good about being that person. I truly believe that when you feel this inside, you will also have as much external success as you could ever want.

My experiences have forced me to challenge my own notions of success and I now make life decisions from the inside-out, in the knowledge that feelings and emotions about a situation count for more than just the situation itself. As a result I am happier, more focussed and find it much easier to make the right choices for me.

I encourage you today to think about your definition of success. Maybe your definition of success is leading you to the right places, and you feel good about where, and who, you are. I hope so. Maybe, however, your definition of success is leading you elsewhere and you have found yourself at the top of a ladder which has been leaning against the wrong wall.

I leave you with this quote by Albert Schweitzer: “Success is not the key to happiness. Happiness is the key to success. If you love what you are doing, you will be successful.”